Saturday, July 28, 2012

Wearing Skirts: A Shift in Thought

So, I have never been a super modest person...but not super immodest either, to be perfectly honest, I had never given it much thought, I mean, I've simply never felt right or comfortable in super short shorts, or skirts, so I've just never worn them, well, unless I had leggings on underneath. Recently, though my heart has shifted in this matter.

Before I get to the point, I feel I should give you a bit of background, and tell you where I am in this journey. My original awareness began about two and a half years ago, I started wearing maxi skirts and I was in love.  I can't explain it, but suddenly I felt so much better in skirts and dresses than I ever had before. Before this point I had always felt so uncomfortable in them, unless I had on leggings or even jeans underneath them, here is a prime example, I wore this outfit CONSTANTLY in high school...now, no way! I would feel so uncomfortable in that!



Oh, how God and time change us! Anyway, suddenly I noticed this odd shift going on in my heart, where I used to feel uncomfortable in skirts and dresses, I now felt uncomfortable in pants and jeans. It's hard to put into words exactly, but I ignored these feelings for awhile thinking "I am NOT one of THOSE women" you know, the long hair, skirt wearing, submitting to husband, Jesus loving, home school believing, super sweet, super smiley, daily Bible reading women...yeah, that woman I now want to be...I'm pretty certain at the point I said I was NOT one of those women God said "Oh really, watch this." I'm still not exactly one of those women, but I can feel God working on me every single day. I ignored this feeling for awhile, I mean, I started buying more skirts and wearing them more often, but I was still determined to not become one of THOSE women....

Then, one day not too long ago it truly "clicked" that I did in fact want to be  no, that somewhere inside I was called be one of THOSE women. I still wear pants and capris some times, but I'm to about 75% of the time in skirts. I'm still trying to balance daycare and crawling around on the floor, and being made fun of with skirt wearing, so that's what I'm working on, just getting over it, and doing what I feel I'm being led to, but I'm only human, and it's a slow process. I try really hard to just let it all roll off my back, but my family (except my hubby) isn't very supportive, and sometimes they make fun of me, or make underhanded comments they think I don't catch, about a week or so ago a woman at the grocery store made a comment about me being a "Christian freak" because of my denim skirt...I hadn't said a word, I was just walking. These kinds of things are the things that I think are holding me back the most. I know that I need to just let it roll off me, but I'm just a work in progress.

When I wear skirts and dresses, I feel better,more womanly,more confident, closer to God, more feminine, more set apart, free, more modest and more inclined to be productive. That's the best way I can describe it, and when I wear pants, jeans and capris I feel more exposed, confined, restricted and just uncomfortable, I can't describe it very well at all, sorry. Now bear in mind, this is not a belief I was raised in, nor is it something that my church promotes, nor something I think every Christian woman needs to do, but it is something I feel like I need to do.

Like I said, I wear skirts and dresses about 75% of the time these days, sometimes I even change into a skirt after all the daycare kids leave, I just feel better in them. My husband has been really supportive of this shift. I'm glad that I have him, otherwise, I just don't know where I would be in this journey. 

I guess I'm writing this post for a few reasons, hopefully to answer any questions my friends and family have about this choice, but also because every time I look for other women talking about this issue it seems that they were all brought up this way, and their church believes this way...I don't have that same background. To be totally honest, I have no clue where my church stands on this issue, the most I know about our modesty stand point, is that you should probably be wearing clothes. Anyway, I always feel so left out when reading things from other women who have made this choice, I don't have anyone to look to for guidance or support, this has all been a very personal journey, and is continuing to be. I do hope that maybe someone else can find some encouragement from my journey.  

See how my skirt wearing has changed? This isn't the best picture, but I am always behind the camera, and when I'm not, it seems to only be from about my waist up. (no, I still don't wear shoes, that will likely never change)

9 comments:

  1. Hello! I too have been making some big changes in my life according to my convictions. I have started wearing skirts and dresses all the time (I did have some experience with this when I was younger) and I have started covering my head (again did this once when I was younger) I really turned from God when I was about 13 and have just recently started rebuilding my relationship with him. People find it odd that a 23 year old would CHOOSE these things lol. it has been the most freeing experience! And I am seeing more and more ladies being convicted of these same things! I just wanted to share that you are not alone :) Your sister in Christ Allicen.

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    1. That means so much to me! I understand completely! I am 23 as well, and yes, people... especially people that knew me before just can't grasp it, freeing is a great way to put it, I just feel better! I am so glad I am not alone!

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  2. Amanda, I know this is an older post but I spied when I hopped over from Matrimonial Monday to peek at your 'How I've Evolved' post. I was the other Featured Blogger this last week! :) I love this post and it spoke to my heart. I am a skirt wearing, Bible reading, attempting to submit wife... I have only been on this journey in skirt world about 10 months. What a ride. I to have had little support in my family world (outside my Hubs and kids) and even less in my church world. Weird, huh? They are afraid to compliment me for fear I will keep up this silliness. They are afraid to mention it for fear I will think they are encouraging me. It is easier to look at me funny and then move on. It is hurtful. I wouldn't be wearing a skirt in the middle of Minnesota winter if I didn't feel God was calling me to do it. Know that you are not alone. I am here. Feeling it with you. I am a better wife, a more submissive woman in Christ, more of a lady when I am dressed like a lady. Hugs!

    Gretchen :)
    www.31cups.blogspot.com

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    1. Hugs to you! Since I posted this I have worn pants ONCE! It was the strangest thing, I felt naked! This post seemed to be my resolve to just put it all to rest, and comply with His will. It seems that everyone is used to me and my crazy long skirts now, occasionally my family will make quips about it, but for the most part I think they know that I am doing this for Christ,and will not change for them! I wish you the best of luck on your journey!

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  3. Hey Amanda! I read this, and I just kinda laughed to myself, because you put it so clearly into words emotions and experiences I went through for years now. Unlike you, I did grow up in a church where skirt wearing is not uncommon, and even taught, but in all honesty most of our church ladies don't necessarily hold fast to that teaching. My family also reacted very differently than yours. My parents raised us as little kids wearing pants and shorts. When I got into the youth group and started really growing close to God, I made that decision on modesty on my own. For awhile I was the only one in my family, although Twila joined not long after. Most people assume my mom wears skirts all the time and has long hair and is one of "those" women. That's not true. Mom wears skirts frequently, but also wears pants and jeans just as often. Kelly wears pants and shorts and all of that. Each of us made our own decision on modesty from what God led us to do...which makes it kind of hard to explain to random passersby. The comments never really stop, although I imagine your family will grow tired of constantly commenting-my extended family still thinks I'm weird, but have become used to it. Some good comes though-I have had people walk up to me at restaurants, malls, amusement parks, etc and ask if I'm a Christian, and have had wonderful conversations with them, sometimes fellowship with fellow Christians, sometimes even opens a door to witness. Just keep true to what you believe God wants you to do, and you will never go wrong. Praying for you, and proud you are doing what you feel is right! :)

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    1. Hey Ariel!

      I must admit, I had your family wrong too! I had always assumed that about your mom as well, and just thought Kelly was a little rebel ;) That's what I get for judging! Yes, my family has quietened down a bit because they know I'm changing for them, but will quip at me occasionally, I've gotten to the place now where I've realized that if the worst thing they can say about me is that I dress weird then I must be doing alright =) Thank you! I've been praying for you guys as well and for your upcoming mission trip!

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  4. Hi Amanda,
    Thank you for this blog! Your article above resounded with me. About 2-3 years ago I started experimenting with skirts and God gradually turned my heart to look more feminine and modest to honor Him. When I was younger (I'm 21), I despised skirts for the same reasons you did: I didn't want to be one of "those" women.
    But now I am. I've even started headcovering as a sign of respect and obedience to my father. And guess what? There is nothing that brings greater joy and peace from the Lord than obeying Him!
    Isn't it amazing how He will change our hearts to bring us joy? It seems that the very things we think we hate will end up making us glad. Father (God) truly does know best!
    God bless you, and again, thank you for your post!

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  5. Hi! I just found this post on Pinterest and was automatically drawn to it because this is something that I am currently going through. I can say "DITTO" to almost everything you have said in this post. I'm glad I'm not the only one. I also love maxi skirts, but what has really began to morph my heart is the study that I have been doing to prepare for a "modesty" bible study for our girls youth group. God has put it on my heart to be... I don't know how to put it... to be Christian in appearance? I've never been one to dress immodestly either-- but I guess I blend in with the rest of the world by how I normally dress. So, anyway, thank you so much for this post!

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    1. Thanks for stopping by! Being Christian in appearance, that's an interesting thing to ponder. Good luck with the Bible study! I have a few other things about modesty geared to younger women, if you're interested, they might be useful!

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Thanks for stopping by! I'd love to hear your thoughts...seriously, I get so excited when I get comments! =)