Before I get to the point, I feel I should give you a bit of background, and tell you where I am in this journey. My original awareness began about two and a half years ago, I started wearing maxi skirts and I was in love. I can't explain it, but suddenly I felt so much better in skirts and dresses than I ever had before. Before this point I had always felt so uncomfortable in them, unless I had on leggings or even jeans underneath them, here is a prime example, I wore this outfit CONSTANTLY in high school...now, no way! I would feel so uncomfortable in that!
Oh, how God and time change us! Anyway, suddenly I noticed this odd shift going on in my heart, where I used to feel uncomfortable in skirts and dresses, I now felt uncomfortable in pants and jeans. It's hard to put into words exactly, but I ignored these feelings for awhile thinking "I am NOT one of THOSE women" you know, the long hair, skirt wearing, submitting to husband, Jesus loving, home school believing, super sweet, super smiley, daily Bible reading women...yeah, that woman I now want to be...I'm pretty certain at the point I said I was NOT one of those women God said "Oh really, watch this." I'm still not exactly one of those women, but I can feel God working on me every single day. I ignored this feeling for awhile, I mean, I started buying more skirts and wearing them more often, but I was still determined to not become one of THOSE women....
Then, one day not too long ago it truly "clicked" that I did in fact
want to be no, that somewhere inside I was called be one of THOSE women. I still wear pants and capris some times, but I'm to about 75% of the time in skirts. I'm still trying to balance daycare and crawling around on the floor, and being made fun of with skirt wearing, so that's what I'm working on, just getting over it, and doing what I feel I'm being led to, but I'm only human, and it's a slow process. I try really hard to just let it all roll off my back, but my family (except my hubby) isn't very supportive, and sometimes they make fun of me, or make underhanded comments they think I don't catch, about a week or so ago a woman at the grocery store made a comment about me being a "Christian freak" because of my denim skirt...I hadn't said a word, I was just walking. These kinds of things are the things that I think are holding me back the most. I know that I need to just let it roll off me, but I'm just a work in progress.
When I wear skirts and dresses, I feel better,more womanly,more confident, closer to God, more feminine, more set apart, free, more modest and more inclined to be productive. That's the best way I can describe it, and when I wear pants, jeans and capris I feel more exposed, confined, restricted and just uncomfortable, I can't describe it very well at all, sorry. Now bear in mind, this is not a belief I was raised in, nor is it something that my church promotes, nor something I think every Christian woman needs to do, but it is something I feel like I need to do.
Like I said, I wear skirts and dresses about 75% of the time these days, sometimes I even change into a skirt after all the daycare kids leave, I just feel better in them. My husband has been really supportive of this shift. I'm glad that I have him, otherwise, I just don't know where I would be in this journey.
I guess I'm writing this post for a few reasons, hopefully to answer any questions my friends and family have about this choice, but also because every time I look for other women talking about this issue it seems that they were all brought up this way, and their church believes this way...I don't have that same background. To be totally honest, I have no clue where my church stands on this issue, the most I know about our modesty stand point, is that you should probably be wearing clothes. Anyway, I always feel so left out when reading things from other women who have made this choice, I don't have anyone to look to for guidance or support, this has all been a very personal journey, and is continuing to be. I do hope that maybe someone else can find some encouragement from my journey.
See how my skirt wearing has changed? This isn't the best picture, but I am always behind the camera, and when I'm not, it seems to only be from about my waist up. (no, I still don't wear shoes, that will likely never change)